One Two Three
by Girl With The Dandelion
Summary: "Dying is frightening enough as it is; dying for a cause is something so much more." Movie-verse moment with Peeta, Katniss and the nightlock.


I can hear Claudius speaking, just barely. I am too focused on the future. I can see it so clearly, so thoroughly. Katniss and I. We arrive in District 12. We are victors. We are together. Eventually, we would get married. Have a family. We are together above and beyond all doubts. We have a life with each other. Through my daydream I can hear his words. But my mind will not allow me to comprehend them. Not yet.

Would Katniss want children? Would she want to be married to me? I feel doubt begin to build in me, but I repress it. I can't think that way. I just can't focus on the what-ifs. I need to be here, in the now. And right now something amazing is happening. We have won. _We_have won.

"May the odds be ever in your favor."

I am brought back to reality with a bang. I feel like someone has jolted me out of sleep; someone has interrupted the best dream I have ever had and I just want to go back to sleep. But I know this moment, this dread I feel building in me, is real. _May the odds be ever in your favor. Only one winner. _

It hits me then. Everything Claudius has been saying. The reason why Katniss and I are not on a hovercraft on our way home; there can only be one winner. No. No. No.

"Do it," I whisper. Because the alternative is not even an option. If her life is to come to an end, it will not be by my hand. And everyone better expect me to follow directly in her footsteps. A life without this girl in front of me is not a life I am interested in living. "They have to have a winner Katniss."

She looks so conflicted. So strong and so afraid. And dare I see it, she looks broken hearted. Could it be? Is her heart legitimately breaking at the thought of killing me? We are friends. She did kiss me. Still. I can't help but feel those what ifs surface again. But with or without those what ifs, I know what I have to do. There are no doubts following my decision. It was never a choice really; why did this "slight rule change" surprise me at all? We were born to die. That has been the rule for 74 years. Only one person can live. Only one person can make it out; I know that one person was never going to be me. Not as long as Katniss lived. And I will make sure she will.

"Go ahead."

She looks at me, brokenhearted. I feel as though it is definite now. Every doubt I have ever had is gone with that one look. "One of us should go on. One of has to die." Even though I'm saying these words, I don't want them to be true. Finally after all of this time, all of this waiting and pining, Katniss is mine. Not a prize or a trophy but a gift. She's all I have ever wanted, all I _could_ever want, and she's being ripped away from me. I want to hold on forever; I don't ever want her to leave my sight again, but I know. I know this is the only way. The alternative is not even an option. Because if she were to die, if she were literally gone, the Hovercraft picking me up had better be quick to get me otherwise I'll take an arrow to my own heart.

She's still looking at me. She looks like she might cry. _Be strong_ I think to myself. I don't want to say it out loud. I don't want the Capitol and the Districts even, to see an ounce of vulnerability in her. I'm afraid of what they might do to her when she wins. A vulnerable Katniss is much more at risk than an invincible Katniss. I knew the rumors. I knew what they did to desirable Tributes. I'll be damned if they do anything remotely close to that to her. She steps forward. To what? Kill me. _Please. Do it._I want this to be over with. I want to be gone now. I don't want this pain sitting on my chest anymore. This knowing is going to kill me before any of her arrows could. Knowing what we almost had; knowing what could have been; knowing how close I came to having every dream come true. It's enough to drive a person mad.

"No, they don't." What is she talking about? Claudius has distinctly said there can only be one winner. Only one.

And then I notice her clenched fist unfold. I see the berries. It all clicks into place.

"No Katniss!" She takes my hand and I never want her to let go. "Trust me. Trust me," she whispers and I feel the berries fall into my hand. What she's implying is too much for me to handle. She would rather die than make it out of this arena without me. She would rather cease to exist without me. I do not want her to do this. Not at all. I want her to keep going, to move on. But isn't this exactly what I was just willing to do? To take myself out of the picture because I can't bear to live a life without her. It would be cruel to make me even try. It would be cruel to make her try. But if we both die, if we're both gone…surely the Capitol will be displeased they didn't get their Victor. This is what they live for. To parade us around and force us to become murderers and then make one of us survive it all. They make one of us live without the other 23 for the rest of forever, haunted by memories and the what-could-have-been. I won't let that happen to Katniss.

"Together?"

She looks at me, a hint of doubt in her features. I can understand this doubt. Dying is frightening enough as it is; dying for a cause is something so much more.

"Together."

She's so close. She's seems so afraid and again, that vulnerability shows through. It's barely visible, but I've been observing Katniss for so long now that I see it instantly. She's only sixteen. She's just like me. She's just a kid. No matter what she has had to do. No matter who she has had to become, she is only a child.

"One," I say. I extend my hand forward; I was going to touch her cheek but instead I grab her braid. After all these years, she's right in front of me and I am going to lose her. I just want to take her away from this place, but not in the way we are leaving. I want to be alive and sweep her off her feet. I want to unravel her braid and let it tumble down her back. It's all I've ever wanted. All I could ever hope for. I feel her hair in my fingers; it's softer than I had imagined it being.

She looks away but I still hold her braid. This braid which is as much apart of her as anything else. I've never seen her with her hair down before the Games. This braid is Katniss.

"Two," she says, a hint of defiance in her voice. Defiance? What would she have to be defiant about? Not playing on their terms? I am feeling kind of defiant myself. They do not own us.

"Three."

**Author's Note: **So I usually try not to do movie-verse moments, but the braid scene has stuck with me. I just could not suppress my Everlark feels for that moment! I had to write this. And if the dialogue is off, I'm so sorry. I tried to take notes the last time I saw the movie, but it was dark so I couldn't see what I was writing and thus could hardly tell what the heck I wrote. Anyways, please let me know what you thought. Writing from Peeta's point of view is very challenging to say the least.


End file.
